Though it is desirable that a young man marries as soon as possible after puberty, some have to wait for many years before they can afford to pay vulvar. Although it is not the sole responsibility of the groom to arrange for the vulvar, it is he who suffers if his family is unable to raise the required amount. The amount of vulvar is decided upon by the fathers of the bride and the groom, keeping in view the family background of the bride and her physical attraction. It is the father of the bride who keeps the full bride-price. In rare cases the bride is given dowry from her parents which, in most cases, is not very expensive. Endogamy is a common practice and brides-exchange is also observed. Sometimes marriages are arranged to mediate a rivalry in which a girl from the aggressor’s family – who is considered the honour of the family – is given in marriage to a member of the victim’s family. Elopement is a taboo and both the girl and the boy are murdered if found by the relatives.

The process of marriages starts with the parents of the boy searching a suitable match for their son as soon as he is mature enough to get married. Mothers have a relatively small role in deciding about the marriage of their son or daughter. Neither the groom nor the bride is allowed to choose his or her life partner him- or herself. The decision made by the parents is considered final, however, sometimes the groom is consulted before the final decision. When the parents of the groom select a bride for their son, they make a formal proposal to the bride’s parents, who may accept or reject the proposal. If both parties agree, details of the marriage, including the amount of vulvar and dates of the wedding, are finalised. When all the details are decided upon satisfactorily, a mullah offers dua-e-khair (pray of goodness). A few days before the wedding, theUkkaré (formal engagement) is performed. All the expenses for entertainment of the wedding guests are paid for by the groom’s family. Soon after the wedding, the groom arranges valima (marriage feast) which is attended by a large number of people from the clan and other celebrities of the area. During the whole wedding process, no meals are offered by the bride’s family. However, after the wedding has taken place, the groom and his close relatives are invited by the bride’s parents to a feast which denotes that now he is a formal member of their family.

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